The Baby Boomers : Gray Divorce Trend Setters
Recently a very important research paper was released by Bowling Green State University sociologists Susan L. Brown and I-Fen Lin, concerning Divorce after Age 50. With the United States having the highest divorce rate in the world (40-45%), divorce and older adults have not been frequent subjects of research. Since the “boomers” generation came of age, the pampered children of a very strong postwar economy have rebelled against the restrictive conventions of their parents and have pushed the limits of their parents’ institutions and traditions.
The Baby Boomers generation has displayed significant marital discord. After 1979 the young baby boomers were responsible for the extraordinary rise in marital instability in the United States. Although the U. S. divorce rates are starting to head downward, the divorce rates for Boomers have doubled since 1990. 1 in 4 couples who are divorcing today are 50 years and older!
A Pew Research study on social trends found that “when it comes to divorce, baby boomers are less conservative than younger generations. 66% of baby boomers say divorce is preferable to staying in an unhappy marriage as compared to 54% of younger adults.
What are some of the major reasons for the large increase in Boomer divorce?
1. Boomers have the economic livelihood and feasibility to address divorce and this rate will continue to rise. It is projected that by 2030, there will be a 25% increase in boomer divorces! About ½ of these Boomer divorces will come from short-term remarriages.
2. As the “Boomer” children leave the “nest”, many older adults realize that their spouse no longer meet each other’s needs in the next life stage. “If Marriage isn’t making me happy, divorce is now an acceptable solution”.
3. When a lack of communication exists between a couple, infidelities contributes to a breakdown and expedites marriage failure.
4. Another big factor is increasing economic independence of women. Many women now do not have to choose between a bad marriage and poverty. They have the means to care for themselves and want happiness and companionship not provided in a loveless or inadequate marriage.
A divorce always results in both an emotional and financial ending. Boomers have shown that, in this era of individualism and lengthening life expectancies, these individuals want to release themselves from unhappiness and uncertainty. Sad but true, more baby boomers will break their marriage bonds and head out to unknown adventures!
Texas Divorce : Who is Responsible for Student Loans in a Divorce
The State of Texas is a “Community Property State.” What this means is that most debts incurred by either spouse during a marriage will be owed by the couple or community. The shared community debt is only applied to debts incurred during the marriage. If one of the spouses incurs a student loan before marriage, such person will have total responsibility for the debt. An exception to this rule would be where a spouse signs onto an account as a joint account holder after a marriage or refinances jointly during marriage.
If a couple is living together, but are not married, the person carrying the student loans will be solely responsible for his/her debt.
How can couples avoid Student Loans Debt Problems?
In Community Property States (Texas, Arizona, California, Idaho, Louisiana, Nevada, New Mexico, Washington & Wisconsin) couples can sign a Pre or Post Nuptial Agreement to have their debts and income treated separately. A very good time to do this would be if one spouse is going back to school or pursuing higher education, or is starting a new business.
Before marriage, have a discussion with your future spouse on the extent of his/her debts and your financial situation. Nothing will sour a loving relationship more than unexpected understood debt.
Taxes 2013 : Who Is Entitled To Use The Tax Exemption on Children After a Divorce
As we now approach the deadline for filing our 2013 federal income tax return, many divorced parents are asking this question, “Which parent may legally claim their children on their tax return”? This question has become complicated with the rise in fathers’ rights, expansion in non-custodial parents visitation periods, and advance parenting schedules allowing children to spend quality if not equal time with both parents throughout the year.
In the past the Internal Revenue Code provided that the custodial parent was allowed to claim the minor children on his/her federal income tax return. Mom was usually the custodial parent and Dad usually had the children every other weekend.
The Internal Revenue Code states that the parent with whom the child lived with for the greater number of nights during the year is entitled to claim the dependency exemption.
If during or following a divorce in final judgment, the two divorcing parents agree that one parent shall claim the child as a dependent in odd numbered years and the other parent in even numbered years, or if the divorcing parents have more than one child, one parent shall claim some children, while the other parent shall claim the other children, this agreement in your final divorce decree will be honored by the IRS.
If your divorce was final before 2008, just attach the final divorce decree to your tax return. If your divorce was final after 2008, your ex-spouse must fill out IRS form 8332 which provides the name of your children that you can claim on your federal income tax return.
I you are divorced in 2013 and have questions please contact your tax adviser or go to the website http://www.irs.gov/Forms-&-Pubs for more information.
My Marriage is in Trouble! There is an Addict in the House!
Addiction is one of the most damaging and challenging problems spouses will ever face in a marriage. Because additive behavior touches everyone in a family, most marriages are severely damaged years before a decision is reached to end the marriage.
Most non-addictive members of a family feel helpless because they cannot stop the addict’s downhill spiral that destroys the family eventually resulting in divorce. Addiction hurts the addict, the spouse, children and extended family members.
Some Statistics on Addiction in the US
– The United States accounts for only 5% of the world’s population. However, two-thirds of illegal drugs are consumed in America.
– Approximately 14 million Americans, 7.4% of the population, meet the diagnostic criteria for alcohol abuse or alcoholism.
– Children of addicts or alcoholics are almost 3 times as likely to be verbally, physically. or sexually abused; and 4 times more likely than other children to be neglected.
– 1 in 4 deaths in the U .S. can be attributed to alcohol, tobacco, or illicit drug use.
– More than 75% of domestic violence victims report that their assailant had been drinking or using illicit drugs at the time of the incident.
– 8 million Americans have eating disorders
– 2 million U.S. citizens are estimated to be pathologically, problematic gamblers
– 1 to 2 million cocaine addicts in the US
– At least 12 million American spouses suffer from the effects from the effects of living with an addict.
All addictive illnesses are usually progressive and unless help is sought through attained rehabilitation, 12-step programs or other meaningful support, an addict will predictably continue to act in a self-destructive manner. The threat of divorce is usually not enough incentive for the addict to address their addiction.
Parent Alienation in Divorce
In recent years, “parent alienation” has become more prevalent in divorce cases. Parent alienation is the dramatic change in the relationship between a parent and their child when the child is used as a tool by one parent to hurt the other parent. Parent alienation can include much more than brainwashing of a child. In many cases, the child becomes hostile towards the alienated parent as they are fed not just conscious, but subconscious and unconscious, messages by the alienating parent. Frequently, the child will turn on the parent they previously loved and were very close to prior to the institution of the divorce proceeding. In some cases, the alienating parent will go to extreme lengths to keep the alienated parent from seeing the child for long periods of time. Children begin acting out and the situation quickly becomes volatile.
When children are used in such a manner, emotions are quickly aroused and a very simple divorce case can quickly become a highly contested case fueled by resentment and hostility. Parents who are successful in getting primary custody of a child in a parent alienation situation share many similar characteristics and may use some of the following tools to assist them in their defense:
- Keep an even-temper, remain logical and keep your emotions under control. Never retaliate.
- Though you may think of giving up, never do so.
- Go to the financial expense of seeing the case through. Never give up on your child. There can be nothing more important than the happiness of your child.
- Seek help from a skilled attorney who has experience with parental alienation.
- Familiarize yourself with how the courts work and the laws as they apply to your specific case.
- Seek professional help and diagnosis.
- Request a social study into the circumstances of the child
- Request a psychological evaluation of the alienating parent
- Keep a chronology or diary of events (this will help to jog your memory, keep track of witnesses, etc.).
- Document the alienation for submission as evidence in court.
- Keep the best interest of the child at heart.
- Provide the Court with an appropriate parenting plan.
- Make sure you understand the nature of the problem and focus on correcting it, even though you are being victimized.
- Always call and show up for visitation with your child at the scheduled time, even if there is no chance of the child being there.
- Take witnesses to testify that the child is not at home when you exercise your visitation rights.
- Focus on the child, and never talk to the child about the other parent or the divorce case.
- Never violate the Court’s orders.
- If you are receiving disturbing phone calls from the child or the other parent, tape the calls.
- If you are receiving disturbing emails or text messages from the child or the other parent, make a copy and place in a file.
Though none of these tips will guarantee that you get custody of the child, they will definitely assist you in building a case against the parent who is attempting to alienate you from your child.
The Nacol Law Firm PC
Law office of Attorney Mark Nacol
Serving clients in the Dallas – Fort Worth Metroplex area for over 30 years
Tel: 972-690-3333
NACOL LAW FIRM P.C.
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Dallas, Texas 75231
972-690-3333
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Attorney Mark A. Nacol is board certified in Civil Trial Law by the Texas Board of Legal Specialization
